confidential

tonight completely ruined my day, my week, my night...and i dont know what to do. We had a dinner party tonight and i thought it went so well, and then my parents start fighting again, as they do every night. and lately my dad has barely been coming home and my mom misses him and hardly gives him respect and blames him for everything and vice versa, and both of them need to realize what they have. but they were yelling and hes leaving and i was right in the middle of it, and he came to say goodnight to me and i wouldnt let him hug me and act like everything was okay, and then they started fighting again and i was right there and i just cant handle this. and didnt know what to do so i  called koler naturally, and he didnt answer but then he called me back and i was still sobbing my eyes out, and i thought it would be comforting. It felt good to get it out and tell someone my problems, but he didnt comfort me at all. i almost feel like he lost his personality. and thats what i liked most about him, and now he never shows it. He kept saying he was sorry torrey, and im sorry sweety, but it sounded so fake and awkward. i know he wanted to comfort me, but he doesnt know how any more i feel like. and maybe i just imagined how he was a good boyfriend. i cant decide. he cant be himself around me in person anymore, or he just doesnt know what to say. i dont know, because like today i asked him how he was doing and he just said good how was deca? and it was sucha  generic answer for someone who has been through so much with me. i mean i was wondering genuinely how he was and when i text him he always goes into detail, but not in person. and then he asked me how deca was, and i mean was he not listening to me every time i called him EVERY day???? like seriously i dont know whats wrong with him, but if hes gonna keep being like this, then i definetly dont want to be back with him. ahhh familys suck, i wish we could all just be together and not fight and just be happy, and love each other. They both dont know what they have, and hes leaving tonight right now at the moment, i dont know if its temporary...i  think it is because i made him promise to go to counseling, but  i dont know what they will do. please dont mention this to anyone, or any of your familys because this is really personal and i dont want it leaking out to anyone (parents or kids), because we dont know how things will work out. they could get way better or way worse, so please dont tell anyone k? i love you guys soo much, torrey